"Speaking the Truth in Love" given August 5

Have you heard the story of the young Pastor's first sermon in a new church? This Pastor was newly ordained. Since it was his first sermon, he wanted badly to impress the congregation with what a good preacher he was, and with the outstanding moral standards he preached.

This young preacher had been given to understand by his predecessor that his new congregation were not above expressing themselves during worship with a "Amen" now and then. So he figured, what the hey, he'd go for broke-- try for some "Hallelujahs". So he worked harder on this sermon than he ever had on any of the ones he'd written in seminary. The first Sunday came. After his introduction, he began to preach. It seemed to be going allright, and then he came to his first point.

"All of those people in this town who hang out down at the corner bar are sinners, and going to go to hell."

"Hallelujah!" came a chorus from the congregation. Hey, that was all right. He liked getting an "Amen." So he thought he'd try for another one.

"And I know that while very few of you may hang out in the bars, some of you are not above tipping the bottle at home every day. And those of you who do that are no better than any of those sinners, even though you do go to church."

"Amen!" Came the chorus. It seemed to him this was a little weaker than that first Hallelujah. But he might have been mistaken, so the new preacher plodded on.

"And all of those of you who covet their neighbor's spouse and sneak around cheating on your own spouse are sinners, and you're going to go straight to hell. Do not pass go, do not collect $200."

"Amen." There were distinctly fewer voices this time. Since he was new in ministry, he was too inexperienced to preach off the cuff, or to vary from his text.

"And all you who smoke that devil's weed, those cigarettes, and pipes and cigars, you're just getting your mouths set for the smoke you're gonna be breathing in hell!"

"That's right, preacher." Came even fewer voices. He couldn't help notice though, one elderly sister down in front enthusiastically leading the chorus of affirmation. Not knowing what else to do, he continued.

"And all of you women who wear that sinful lipstick and rouge, you're going to hell too!"

"Uh huh!" There were very few women's voices that time. But he noticed that his cheerleader was right there, leading those in agreement. “Amen!” she said.

"And all of you people who gossip and backstab and tell tales about neighbors are headed for perdition!"

"Yes sir." Only four or five people responded. But he could still hear the voice of that sister down front. “Amen!”

"And all of you who gamble on those horses and play that sinful bingo at the church down the street are going to hell."

"Amen!" Came the thin voice of that single elderly woman.

"And all of you who chaw on that nasty old tobacco, you're going to hell."

In the silence that ensued he could hear his last supporter turn to her neighbor and comment aloud,

"Now he's quit preachin' and started in to meddlin'."

That young man didn't know how to get his point across. But the prophet Nathan knew how. In this morning's OT Reading, we see him sneak up on his erring King. Before David is aware of what's happened, Nathan has zapped him.

The Apostle Paul calls it "speaking the truth in love." Whatever we call it, the fact is that poor old David doesn't even get a chance to claim that Nathan has started in to meddlin'.

"The man who did this thing surely deserves to die", says the King in a straight line that's too good to ignore.

"You are the man!" Ouch! Down through the ages, many commentators have objected to the historicity of this story. And certainly, as a piece of literature, Nathan’s parable is no great shakes. How could a sharp operator like David have been so dumb as to not see where Nathan was going with his parable? It does after all, seem like a pretty obvious parallel between the wealthy man in the parable who stole his neighbor's only sheep, and the King who stole his servant's wife.

But it was indeed the custom for the King to hear cases brought to him for judgement. David had no reason to believe this was not such a case. And we need to recall the power of parables as well. Especially if we don't know we're hearing one, they can slip in on us and crawl in between the cracks of our minds' o-so-carefully-crafted mental defenses. They lure us into agreement, after agreement, and then, "gotcha"--

"You are the man" proclaims God's messenger. And our eyes are opened. And we find ourselves convicted of our own sin. And we find that we have been convicted by our own agreement, our own words, our own consciences.

It was no accident that Jesus used parables so much. Like a joke, they depend on common understandings of reality. They depend on a shared agreement as to what is right and wrong and funny and tragic. But in this context, parables also depend upon a shared faith, a shared experience of what it is to worship God and a shared understanding of what it is that God expects from us.

The irony then, is that in order for the king to be surprised and caught by the prophet's parable, he must first of all be formed and converted by the prophet's God. The irony is, that in order for us to hear the truth of God spoken in love, we must share that common faith as well.

The other reason that Nathan's parable struck King David so close to home was David's own moral and spiritual blindness. Granted, he had committed adultery with Bathsheeba. But David had tried to make it right! It wasn't his fault Uriah had gummed up the works by refusing to sleep with his wife on his weekend furlough! David had no choice! If he hadn't acted to protect her, Bathsheeba could have been convicted and stoned as an adulteress! It was too bad for Uriah, but it had to be done.

David's not so different from us. We're blind too. We're all whizzes when it comes to rationalization and justification. We're great at fooling ourselves that our sin "didn't really hurt anyone", or "turned out for the best", or that "it would have turned out that way anyhow". We're great, like David, at turning a blind eye to our own short-comings, or to those of our friends and families while being ready to condemn someone else.

"C'mon Terri. You'll do it if you love me. No one'll ever know. Nothing's gonna happen."--- "How do I know it's my baby?" "I'm sorry, honey. I swear, I'll never hit you again. It's just that I love so much." But the truth is, you are the man, you are the abuser.

"No you can't have them over. I just cleaned the house. Go over to one of your friend's. Besides, I'm talking on the phone to Aunt Susie right now."-- “Well Susie, I know that my kid would never have a thing like that. It's those other little monsters. I don't know why the school board didn't prosecute. I can't imagine how those other parents can let their children run wild in the streets of this town." But the truth is... You are the woman.

"Well, by the time the store sends the check to the bank, I'll have made my deposit--with any luck." "Hey, it's not really lying. It's creative accounting. Besides, the government wastes so much tax money that they won't miss this little white amount." But the truth is....

"One little lottery ticket can't hurt. Besides, the money goes to education.” “One little poker game can't hurt. One little bet can't hurt. It's no worse than playing the lottery." But the truth is....

"Hey, you distract the clerk, and I'll cop this candy bar. It's just one. They'll never miss it." "Hey, you distract the clerk while we sneak into the adult room. What the heck. It's not hurtin' nobody." But the truth is....

"I feel trapped in my work. But I have to do it. It's expected of me.” "I feel trapped in this marriage. But we're staying together for the kids. So how about you and me getting together some time?" "They never really had a stable marriage. If it hadn't been me, it would've been someone else." “What she doesn’t know can’t hurt her—or me.” But the truth is... .

We human beings have a seemingly endless capacity for self-deception. We kid ourselves about who we are. We kid our selves about what we do. And we kid ourselves about what are the consequences of what we do. We blind our selves to the truth.

That way, we don't have to take responsibility. That way, it's somebody else's mess to clean up, somebody else's baby to raise, somebody else's kid who gets in trouble. Or, like David, if we do recognize there's a mess, we concentrate on covering up, keeping the public image, rather that recifying the real harm that has been done.

David figured he had the situation handled. Bathsheeba's reputation was saved. Her baby had a name and a father. And David had her. David had provided a neat solution to every aspect of the problem.

Except... David forgot about someone else who felt wronged--someone else who had a stake in the King's moral behavior-- someone who is far more concerned about honesty than about appearances-- someone for whom questions of right and wrong are paramount, rather than peripheral.

"Once there was a man...." began the prophet.

"Surely this man deserves to die!" decreed the King.

"You are the man!" declared the prophet.

"I have sinned against the Holy One."

But David does not die. His recognition of his sin, his act of confession is his salvation before God. This Sunday's reading ends here. But the story doesn't. There's no happy ending.

Though David eventually gets right with his Maker over the murder of Uriah, the human consequences of that act are not so easily erased. The story will haunt not just David, but Israel. It is the beginning of David’s fall. David's spiritual blindness continues as well. Eventually it will cost him the affection of his children, and the deaths of four of them.

The plain fact is, that our sins or wrong-doings do have a way of boomeranging back on us and zapping us. The plain fact of the matter is, there are consequences when you and I stray from the path of righteousness and integrity. The plain fact is that those consequences have a way of haunting us, and wrecking havoc on our lives, and even on our families and their lives.

There’s a dark, self-centered, shadow side—a secret sinner-- within each and every one of us-- buried deep down inside-- that wants what it wants when it wants it. And it wants because it is wounded, or incomplete, or broken, or scarred, or scared, or just plain immature. And it wants regardless of what the better part of us wants.

It wants regardless of what reason or faith or ethics or morality tell us. And it wants regardless of the consequences-- for us or for others. And in order to achieve what it wants, our shadow side wraps itself in inner darkness that blinds us to the truth about itself, and about ourselves, and about our motives, and about our actions. And in order to achieve what it wants, our secret shadow sinner will generate ferocious energy in us, and can lead us to develop amazing abilities solely directed to acquiring those self-centered shadow goals.

Part of the process of becoming a real, live, adult is recognizing and naming that shadow side of ourselves-- its nature, its desires, its roots, its power over us, its perils and yes, sometimes its gifts. Part of the process of becoming a real, live, mature Christian is learning to give that energy and those gifts over to our Maker, the Source of all truth and light--the only One who can teach us to harness and channel them for growth and ministry.

Make no mistake. Our God is willing to forgive us our sins when you and I honestly repent. But we also have to be willing to clean up the mess we have made. And after we’ve done that, after we’ve accepted the consequences and made our amends, sometimes we can even go on to make a positive contribution to God’s plan and to our world.

But in order to do all that, you and I first have to be willing to look at ourselves-- our lives, our work, our world, our actions, our deepest natures. We have to be willing to look all around us and look within us through eyes that are open, not blinded by shadow and self-deception.

Let us pray,

Lord, open our eyes to the truth spoken in love. Open our ears to the cries of others. Open our hearts to your word. Amen.